Thief writes open letter to Rhymefest

Here it is, or most of it anyways:

“Whoever reads this open letter, whether it be Allido Records, J Records or Rhymefest (I don’t care), listen very carefully.

To all rappers and producers: DO NOT LEAVE YOUR iPOD OR LAPTOP UNATTENDED WHEN YOU ARE IN A PUBLIC PLACE. I will get to that in a second.

First of all, I am a huge fan, and I love your music. I’m one of those people who consider you to be a highly underrated artist, partly due to the wack-ass label you signed to and their lack of promotion, partly due to how lame the Hip-Hop industry is and partly due to your inconsistent record releases. But, I’m going to help you. They say an artist can only create great art through great suffering. I’m going to make you a better artist, and I do this out of love for your music.

I’m not going to say where or when (because then you may realize who I am), but you were in a public place recently with your iPod hooked up to a sound system playing music for people, and I caught you slipping. You actually walked away for 15 WHOLE MINUTES!!! Then, you forgot it!!! Wow. I grabbed MAD music off of your iPod. And what did I find? A ton of songs you recorded for EL CHE. Maybe you shouldn’t label the songs soo obviously.

This sh*t sounds incredible. Actually, this shit is HOT FIRE!!! Why isn’t this sh@t out, ni**a? Don’t answer that. It doesn’t matter. I’m going to help you out, and here is why.

I bought BLUE COLLAR when it dropped. BLUE COLLAR and Busta’s THE BIG BANG were the most noteworthy releases that year. And you didn’t even go gold? How the fuck does that happen? Oh, my bad: J Records. But, I digress…

I went to some of your shows. I even traveled to see you perform when I could. Hot shit every single time, dude. You never disappoint. But, you would do shit on your MySpace that would build up a fan’s anticipation, and then you wouldn’t do sh*t! The EL CHE logo contest? You never said shit about a winner. The PLUGG CITY tour? My cousin submitted her info, and you never said sh*t about a winner. Who the fu&k does that? But, hey: I’m a fan. You must have had a reason, right? Don’t get me wrong: I’m not a Stan or some sh@t like that. I simply need you to do what you say you’re going to do.

Then, you claim that EL CHE was coming out last year. Then, it was this year. More contrived industry inconsistency. I’ve heard some songs like “Angry Black Man on a Elevator” and “Real Nigga Quotes” and I even heard “Exodus” for the 3.5 seconds you put it on your MySpace. That sh*t sounds incredible. I watched the YouTube videos with the Just Blaze and Jazzy Jeff joints. What the f@ck is up with that Jazzy Jeff project, dude?!? Either you or your label are some fuc*ing liars regarding what the f@ck is coming out, and I, for one, am tired of it. And, another thing: how the fu$k are you going to come at Lupe Fiasco for his political views when you didn’t even have an album out? Was you trying to get attention, ni@@a? Is that it? Attention for what? A new single? EL CHE??!!!?? I don’t see a release date, my ni$$a. Where art thou, release date?

Was it worth it? MAN IN THE MIRROR was dope as f^ck. Why the f*ck isn’t somebody trying to figure out how to sell THAT sh#t?!? I’m confused by you music dudes, for real. I love your s*it. I buy your sh@t. I heard you were working with Dr. Dre on DETOX. Are DETOX and EL CHE ever coming out, ni**a? I NEED NEW MUSIC.

I got songs from your iPod. I’m going to leak a record from EL CHE every week until you drop a single or a video or some sh@t. The people have NO F*CKING IDEA how hot this sh@t sounds. Well, I’m going to show them. You had everything on your iPod. Even old, vintage sh&t. I’m gonna drop that, too. Until you or your weak-ass label keep your word and start dropping some fu$king music. And, I’m not playing. I’m going to make you a better artist. I can’t wait to see what you do.

What do think about this? Is it a real threat, has his iPod actually been stolen or could this be a clever publicity stunt by the label to generate hype for the album?


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